Monday, December 31, 2012
I have heard it said by many people that 2012 was a terrible year. A horrible year. A year they would like to forget. Some of these people have also said the very same thing about 2011, 2010, 2009, etc.
I'd like to send 2012 off with many thanks. It's been a challenging year on many fronts. While setting my goals, personal, spiritual, and athletic, for 2012, I knew that these would involve some discomfort and discontent for me.
All of my goals had to be built from my baseline spiritual goals. There was one goal with 5 aspects. Everything I did, everything, every single thing, had to be in line and beneficial for each of the following which I call
The 5 Things:
1. My relationship with God
2. My marriage
3. My children and extended family relationships
4. My health
5. Becoming debt free
From each of these aspects, I built my goals. In each area, I am thankful to say that I have made great strides! Of course I am far from where I'd like to eventually be, but I am moving in the right direction and have done the work necessary to continue to work on these things in a deeper and more meaningful way.
The troublesome times definitely showed up. Points where I had to decide that even the good things I was involved in had to go. Negative people and situations had to be removed if there was no hope of things changing. That old saying about life being too short...I get it now.
Losing "friends" and feeling quite lonely has been the most difficult thing of all. Once a very social and outgoing person, I find I do most things alone now. I have a circle of friends that are true and not an inflated version of what friendship should be. I am so very grateful and blessed by these people.
I have found myself being called to a lifestyle that is so contrary to anything that I ever have been before and yet, I know that this is where He is asking me to go. I know this because I have seen myself change in ways I never thought possible and yearning for that next step in the change. It is not scary, it is not without direction. I was blessed to find a spiritual director this year, after close to 13 years of seeking one out. This relationship has been the catalyst for so much growth within me that I hardly recognize myself at times. I am thankful that I keep a journal to see this transformation in a more objective way.
On the outside, I may not seem much different, but I know I am seeing things through different eyes today. And this is the blessing.
As far as my goals for 2013, they won't change much from 2012. The only change will be to narrow the path even more so as to focus my efforts even more on the 5 Things. By fall, the 5th thing will be reached and a new goal will begin. The freedom of being debt free will allow us to do things for our future that we have not yet been able to accomplish. I am looking forward to that!
My threshold through which my daily life will pass will be two-fold. I will strive to continue to find joy in each day and I will be practicing the true nature of Gospel Charity. As my faith tells me, I must find Christ in every person that I meet. I must love them as Christ would love them. As I sat in Mass last night, I prayed to God that He show me how I can better do this.
Gospel Charity were the words I heard. Gospel Charity. Of course! How can I possibly "see" or "love" someone as Christ would if I do not "think" of them as Christ does? Gospel Charity needs to begin in my head, move to my heart and then the act will come naturally.
This will be a challenge for me, this I know. I hold myself to a very high standard of expectation and as a result, I hold others to that same standard. This is unfair of me and something I have been trying to change for quite some time. 2013 will give me the opportunity to put this into true practice.
Since this blog is where I tend to document my athletic endeavors, I will share my goals that I have defined thus far.
My main focus for 2013 will be to finish Ironman Texas. I can't really set many goals past that point as I do not know what I will feel like after the race. I would "like" to consider another go at the 100, but I am not ready to commit to that just yet. I hope to at least fit in some 50s. Only He knows where He will bring me.
2013 will be a big year for our family. We will see a college graduation, a high school graduation, an Ironman finish (hopefully), our son going off to college, preparations for Confirmation for Lem and Reconciliation and Eucharist for Boo. I am certain many other things will bless our lives this coming New Year and I look forward to every moment. For even in our trials and hardships we are blessed.
Au Revoir 2012!